Jar of Hearts

     How to live with no fear.......after being terrified for a year straight......

     As I sit here and write, Chloe is taking a nap with Justin. Naps with Chloe are the best feeling ever. If she could climb into your shirt to snuggle you, she would.....and just when you think she sleeping she gently reaches out and softly touches your cheek and says "you're my best friend." Talk about melting my heart.
     I have no idea what 2014 will bring. It doesn't feel like a new year for me........My New Year was 7/12/12 when Austin was born.......and then I had another New Year on 7/23/13 when Austin passed. These were pivotal times in  my life. That ever present fork in the road.......Take the right way, the tough way, the rough way.......or the easy way.......I'm proud of the road I chose. I chose this road. I believe I had two separate destinies.... One with a positive outcome and one with a not-so-positive outcome..........I look back at those two dates......376 days apart and I am proud of the conscious decision I made, we made, after being dealt such pain. People often say to me, "I couldn't handle that" or "I don't know how you do it," or "I'd be a ball on the floor." But the truth is actually quite simple "YOU'RE STRONGER THAN YOU THINK YOU ARE." - quote by Scott Sutherlin.....
     When you cut the tethers, either physical or mental.......there's really is nothing you can't do. You just have to be sharp enough to know you have the scissor to cut all your preconceived ideas.
       This year we will keep a jar on the counter.....This jar will hold little memories of good times and accomplishments........We will look at these at the end of this year......this Jar will not hold bad memories or disappointments ........This jar will not hold regrets or rejections........This jar will be our attitude. This jar will become us.  
       So I ask you, What will your jar hold? Pain or Proud? Tears or conquered fears? Tethered dreams or plans coming to fruition. Cut the tethers and lets see where we go.
Happy New Year Austin. I love you so much.